We give them too much face.

I came across that statement of Marina Mahathir's sometime back that gave me much to contemplate on. Generally we Malaysians are adverse to confrontation and conflict. We prefer being polite and courteous. But then we come across a small number of people who are inured to explanations. Their preferred style is vitriolic. They spew venom and lies; they do not care who or what they damage. And unfortunately for us, some of them also control chess in Malaysia.

So you can see the dilemma. These are small minded and incredibly toxic people and they will not respect your contributions or investments. They do not respect your boundaries or your space. They feel entitled long after their due date and have nothing to offer. But they will not go away. Banded together they have inflicted great harm to Malaysian chess over the years.

They are so used to being able to attack you and attack you without respite because we do not tell them back in their face when they have crossed the line again and again. And funnily when you finally do confront them you find that they are really only paper tigers. Then they try reverse psychology and say you are "bullying" them instead. How typical of bullies.

So I prefer this approach today.

Tell no lies about me and I won't tell the truth about you.

Don't try to ban my son without justification and I won't go for you. Fair enough?

An aside. There is a team that was brought to my attention by my friends, playing at Datmo Team event. It's called "Fools Gone Mad." Very honestly I cannot think of a more appropriate name for some of them. First sign of creative thinking. Do check them out. I will.